I feel completely out of control. I want to throw my hands up in the air and fall to my knees in surrender. I am trying to be strong when all I am doing is falling apart. I can’t make anyone happy because I can’t even keep myself together. I carry a smile on my face as a large burden. I’m tired of being picked a part when I’m already in pieces. This is a private sorrow that has a glimmer of hope that I am choking because I am grasping so hard. Prayer is all I’m left with an illusion of normality. Millions of miles a part yet my heart is right next to him. Please be strong. Please carry your burdens. Please ignore the sorrow. Please be alive.